Independence

I wrote this the summer after I graduated highschool, and it still applies today. I have so many people that question this aspect of my life..so, i thought i would share.

:)

For now, i don't need him. For now, I'm happy being just me. I'm happy being single. I'm strong. I'm independent. I don't need him until i've proved my point. Until i've established myself. I'm a woman who doesn't need a man to complete her or make her happy. Happiness isn't defined in a boyfriend for me. I define happiness when i've reached my goals and accomplished my dreams. Right now, he isn't in that definition. I don't need saving or a knight in shining armor. I'm not needy, i've learned to be alone. I'm normally not clingy, I like my space. I'm not manipulative, if I want something, i'll ask...politely. I'm not really a jerk, until you push ALL of my buttons. I hate getting "hit on", I admire respect. I'm not stupid, I know if i'm wasting my time. I'm not incredibly girly, I just dress like it so don't expect me to run to you with my problems. I'm sassy, but grounded. I'm high maintenance, but only about important things. I talk non-stop, but i'll listen to your every word. I have slight ADD but you have my full attention. I'm sophisticated and elegant, but only when I have to be. I'm goofy, but serious when you need me to be. I live my life for God and strive for His approval, so don't expect me to change for you. I have a smart mouth, I work on it..sometimes. I love to have my way, but will always change it to make you happy. I'm a servant, but also a leader. I'm strong-willed, but compassionate. I'm tough, yet sensitive. I live a life of passion and determination, only God can change my heart/mind. Some say i'm stubborn and fickle, I say i'm like every other female. I'm ready for "him" when the time comes, but i'm not waiting by the phone. I'm out living my life and serving my God. If you need me, you better be God-planned. If not, I won't allow you to waste my time. I'm not going out to look for "him", i'll wait until the time comes. Until then, I have a piece of my heart reserved for him and it won't be tinkered or played with by dating every guy that walks by. It will be fully for "him." Until then, its bottled up. Waiting but not longing. I'm patient because I have a lot to prove and accomplish before I get "tied down" lol. Right now, this is me. Stubborn, hard-headed, independent, and strong. I've been hurt...I forgive and forget. I move on and not let it distract me. Right now, I can fend for myself, I have my backbone of a couple of people who I can count on no matter what. I have priorities to fulfil, first to God. When our relationship is going great, then maybe "he" will come. Until then..."he" can wait. I'm not dating just to have a boyfriend, thats also waste of time. I'm out living my life and becoming my own person. When he comes, I will be ready and I'll know its God's will. Until then...i'm me. And i'm satisfied and happy with that.

love.